30: Beyond the Myths: Understanding BDSM with Coreen Haym, MFT
Posted: September 11, 2020
My guest on the podcast this week features Coreen Haym. Coreen is a visiting faculty member in the Marriage and Family Therapy program, at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, teaching for UNLV since 2007. She has considerable experience presenting and instructing on clinical work with non-traditional families as well as sex therapy, sexual issues, crisis suicide risk assessment, language and diversity diagnosis, LGBTQ studies, kink friendly psychotherapy and gender & sexuality. She is a clinical fellow and an approved supervisor with the AAMFT and is also a member of the American Counseling Association. Currently, Coreen is pursuing her Ph.D. in counselor education at Adam State University and is also a licensed marriage and family therapist with a private practice in Las Vegas, Nevada.
What you’ll hear in this episode:
• How working with BDSM became a focal point for Coreen
• Why it’s important to have the correct information in the public domain
• Providing a safe place for people and dealing with misinformation
• Power dynamics of BDSM
• Having a positive relationship between the therapist and client
• Current definition of BDSM: Bondage, and Discipline (BD), Dominance and Submission (DS), Sadism and Masochism (SM).
• How BDSM isn’t just sexual
• Dynamics of dominance and submission and its relation to power exchange
• How extreme intimacy leads to growth for most people
• Connection between vulnerability and safety
• Subjective feeling of pain and how it’s different for each person
• Misconceptions and myths around BDSM and The Fifty Shades effect
• Non-sexual enjoyment from BDSM
• How for some people it’s a lifestyle and for others a sexual orientation
• What people outside BDSM can learn from the community
• Spirituality and BDSM
• Tips for people curious about BDSM and tips for therapists to support those in the community
Resources
https://www.ncsfreedom.org
https://carasresearch.org
http://soj.org/bdsm-educational-book-list
https://fetlife.com
BDSM as therapy? (PDF)
Psychotherapeutic Issues with “Kinky” Clients- Clinical Problems, Yours and Theirs (PDF)
Unusual Sexual Fantasy (PDF)